All Entries Tagged With: "barack obama"

Obama the House Negro

Obama the House Negro
Before you call me racist, please note that I didn’t say this.
Al Qaeda did.
(article is here)
Yup, some genus over in Afghanistan decided to go racial on president elect Barack Obama.
In an audio tape, Al-Quaida spokesman Ayman al-Zawahri claims that Obama is no Malcolm X and is a “House Negro” who does what [...]

I Will Not Bang Out on the 5th

I Will Not Bang Out on the 5th
I love NY.
I also love movies, so it came as no surprise when I pulled up to my hotel and the doorman opened the door and welcomed me to the Roosevelt that I automatically thought of Home Alone 2.
So, I went upstairs to me newly upgraded suite and [...]

How to Properly Atone

How to properly atone.
On the eve of this Yom Kippur, I started reflecting.
Reflecting on the past year and everything that I accomplished.
True, there are some things I need to apologize for.
I need to say I am sorry for not taking care of my diabetes, but in my defense, candy is just so damn delicious.
I need [...]

Android Apps I Want To See

Android Apps I Want To See - Daily Sexy Comedy by Fat Jewish Guy

With the release of the Android phone next week I came up with a list of android apps that I would like to see created.

For those of you who don’t know, Android is the new cell phone from google.
So, here goes the [...]

Thanksgiving in July

Thanksgiving in July
I love Palm Springs.
True, it was about 120 degrees today.
Even the pool was 90.
But still, I woke up to a great homemade breakfast.
French toast and something called steel cut oatmeal.
I don’t care how it’s cut, I stayed away from that.
Lunch was burgers and hot dogs, but the best was dinner.
Turkey, stuffing, cranberry sauce, [...]

Obama Hates Jews

Obama Hates Jews
After I checked my sugar this morning, I turned on the computer and checked my email.
Imagine my surprise when I saw a letter from Barack Obama.
He was asking for money.
That wasn’t the shocking part.
The email from Obama was addressed to Dirty Jew Jewerstein.
I swear.
The email started out as…
“Dear Dirty Jew –
On Monday, everyone [...]

Pregnancy Pact

Pregnancy Pact
Blood sugar 150.
This is a great news story.
Some chicks in high school decided to get pregnant via a pact so they would all go through it together.
17 of them managed to do so.
Think maybe the high school boys entered into a deadbeat father pact?
In other news, Barack Obama came out with a new TV [...]

American Pig

American Pig
I realized today that I truly am an American Pig.
Wasn’t too hungry when I woke up.
Tried to be healthy, as I ate a turkey wrap.
Had a cup of coffee, a smoke and just chilled while on the computer.
There is something serene about sitting by a pool, in the sunshine overlooking a golf course [...]

Does Barack Obama Drink Grape Kool Aid

Does Barack Obama Drink Grape Kool Aid I have no idea, but I do.
In fact, today was he first time I drank some.
It was so good that I drank a whole pitcher of it.
Tasted just like a melted ice pop.
The grape kool aid went well with the Chinese food that Shorty and I got.
We went [...]

Barack Obama Grandmother African Video

Barack Obama Grandmother African Video
Watching the news this morning you would have thought that Hillary was a battered woman fighting back.
In reality, she won three primaries with the slimmest of margins.
She had slowed Barack Obama’s momentum and got her own.
If Joe Liberman had Joementum then Hillary Clinton has what I like to call Ho-mentum.
But regardless, [...]