All Entries Tagged With: "bagel"

Full Dose Dave

Finally, I was moving on to the full pill of Phentermine.
The doctor had told me to start with half and when I am sure that I don’t have palpitations to move up to the full pill.
So, I woke up, ate a few slices of watermelon and downed the dose.
WOW.
This is how good this drug is.
There [...]

Dog Eater Ice Cream Maker

Dog Eater Ice Cream Maker
Ok, I am officially one of the most insensitive people around.
Granted I was hungry.
Really hungry, but when I went into Einstein Bagel’s I clearly was not thinking straight.
I ordered one, plain, no cheese and was thoroughly enjoying myself when it hit me.
I was eating a bagel dog.
As I was chomping [...]

Roger Clemens Sex Scandal

Roger Clemens Sex Scandal
So much to talk about.
I went to the Vet today to pick up Bagel.
He had been in the refrigerator all weekend awaiting a necropsy. Now, I know what you’re thinking.
Don’t you mean autopsy?
That’s what I thought.
Apparently autopsy is only for humans, and since Bagel was a dog it’s called a necropsy.
Anyway, [...]

Goodbye

As the sun set at camp fox, the voices of 40 children filled the air.
My phone rang. I helped shorty make the call to put down bagel.
It was the right thing to do.
He got sicker and needed a blood transfusion.
I told shorty to say goodbye and walk away.
As I went back to services it was [...]

Attempted Puppy Homicide

I was driving down the street tonight in a blue convertible.
(more on why I have a convertible later)
Anyway, the top was down, the wind in my hair and the music blaring, I looked back on what can only be described as one of the worst days ever.
I woke up much earlier then expected as bagel [...]

Bagel is Back

Bagel is Back
Learning to walk again is hard.
No, I am not talking about bagel.
I’m talking about me.
Shorty didn’t like my old sandals.

She said they look like Jesus would wear them.
Jesus has many followers.
He had to be cool right?
So, I got these.

I don’t see the difference.
Only now, I can’t walk.
It hurts.
I squeak.
Shorty wanted a trendy man.
She [...]

Almost Done With No Bread

I’m starting to feel weak.
Queasy even.
I think it’s the lack of complex carbohydrates.
I need my pasta.
I need my rice.
I forgot how much I really like corn.
But regardless, I ate a salad today.
With chicken and black olives.
Snack was a can of tuna and matzo.
Then a drive to Palm Springs.
Dinner was 3 lbs or tri-tip and some [...]

Carbs Galore

Carbs Galore
I love the day before passover.
I know, it’s technically tomorrow, but why not start a day early.
Especially since tomorrow is the fast of the first born.
I’m not really gonna fast, I think there is a loophole on that, Ill have to look into it.
So, anyway, Bagel and I went out this morning for well, [...]

Bagel Dog Drinks Coffee

Bagel Dog Drinks Coffee
Bagel is the best.
I took him for some free coffee today.
Watching him watch me eat was weird.
I wanted to give him some of my salad and chicken, but I knew I shouldn’t.
He will learn to beg.
So, I locked him up and ate my lunch.
He did manage to drink some coffee though.
If [...]

Cute Overload

Cute Overload
I am tired.
Apparently puppies are hard work.
But, after a long day of walking and petting and feeding and cuddling, I was finally able to relax and watch some Law and Order.
It was a new one.
Wow, they need ratings.
I had my popcorn and my Sprite Zero and ready to watch.
I was treated to an old [...]